well, I know there are some of you that wanted an end to my story.  it has been a rough year for my family but it seems to be healing little by little. Tom and I agreed to separate.  I had to follow my heart and my heart was and always will be with D.  The kids have had a rough go of it but Tom has been amazing even though I know he is hurting too.  I know that I have done a terrible thing to an amazing man.  He proves how amazing he is everytime we are with our children.  He even acts kind to D in front of the kids.  They have learned to accept him and are starting to think its kind of cool to have 2 dads.  Tom has started dating a very nice lady. Even though, it is weird to see him with someone else, I know I cannot have both of them.  There are some members of my family that have chosen not to speak to me but they will come around.  My relationship with D is still as exciting as ever and there are days we have to work at it but who doesn't.  I wake up every day and look into his eyes and thank god that my other half, my lobster, my Big has finally become part of my everyday life. We do plan to get married but we want to give the kids a chance to adjust one step at a time.  We also talked about having a child of our own but that is still on the table.  thanks for caring to all my blog friends adn I hope you all find your true happiness in 2009.  I am sure glad I finally finally have my happily every after.